David Or Daveed: The Truth About Women Wage Peace

A colleague told me once that when his first son was born he wanted to name him David. However he didn’t like the way Americans pronounce Biblical names, so he consulted several sources and discovered that the closest  transliteration of the Hebrew name was Daveed. The next day when the nurse entered the hospital room and saw the name on the baby’s crib, she said “you sure spell David strangely."

I was thinking about this amusing anecdote when I heard that, after their meeting with Sara Netanyahu, the four leaders of Women Wage Peace were labeled "left wing activists" in two different newspapers. This is another example in which, despite the effort we put into our words and our actions, we have very little control over the way other people perceive us.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/david-or-daveed-the-truth-about-women-wage-peace/

A Friend In Need: Cancer And The Vanishing Friends

A short paragraph from the essay “Living With Cancer: Alone And Ghosted” by Susan Gubar (NYT August 6th), made me think about our expectations from friends:

“I depend on a circle of wonderful friends to whom I am enormously grateful. Quite a few gratify me with their company or by going on urgent errands; however, I have been shocked by several who have simply vanished. Perhaps my needs seem too pressing or never ending. Maybe these people feel inadequate, frightened or taken up with their own affairs. As troubles mount, will supporters dwindle?”

Gubar’s experience with her friends is similar to mine. When my husband became ill, many friends phoned to see how we were and  offered to help. They came to visit, and thought of creative ways to make our life more comfortable. For example, some colleagues from the university took him to sit by the sea. My husband enjoyed it all: being an introvert, he wasn’t used to being the center of attention, and often said that he was thankful that cancer made it possible for him to realize that he was loved by his friends.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/a-friend-in-need-cancer-and-the-vanishing-friends/

The Deception of A native Accent

When our friends returned to Israel, after spending ten years in the States, their daughter was almost sixteen year old.  Since she spoke Hebrew with no trace of an accent, and this was the beginning of the tenth grade, and all the students were new to the school, every one assumed that she was a regular Israeli. For the better part of the year, she sat in class understanding very little, but no one suspected anything.

A native accent is deceptive, and could even be dangerous, not only in high school, but especially in the army. Nowadays there  are quite a few children of Yordim (Israelis who left the country) that return to Israel on their own to serve in the army.  Those young people speak fluent Hebrew, but like my friends’ daughter, they are not Israelis.

Returning to Israel from another country after growing up believing that here was their real home, these young people have many dreams and expectations.  However, they lack the knowledge and the necessary experience of our society to be able to deal with the reality of the army.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/the-deception-of-a-native-accent/

Ignoring Each Other? The Hirschsprung Family And The Smartphones

The portrait of The Hirschsprung Family, by the Danish painter Peder Severin Krøyer, was posted on Facebook,by Scott E. Bartner, with this amusing caption:

“How people ignored each other before smartphones”

Indeed the seven members of the  Danish/German Jewish family in the painting, are gathered on the balcony, no one talks and they hardly acknowledge one another.

The two boys, leaning on the baluster railing on the far right, stare intently at something, which takes place in the garden beneath the balcony.The father stands at the center of the painting, next to his two older sons and the three of them read a newspaper. On the other side, are the women: the mother and the only daughter. They are holding some kind of a needlework on their laps, but they do not work. Instead, the girl is smiling at something beyond the scope of the painting. The mother gazes at the same direction, and at the same time she is glancing approvingly at the girl.

Please keep reading in The times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/ignoring-each-other-the-hirschsprung-family-and-the-smartphones/

Who Needs The Israel Broadcasting Authority?

This morning on Israeli Public Radio, the news program Hakol Diburim  (All Talk) stopped after one hour because of an emergency meeting. The journalists are protesting against the imminent threat to close IBA and fire many of its employees.

As can be seen from the following essay, written at the time when the unfortunate decision to dismantle IBA was made, I am not  a detached observer. However, like many other Israelis, I rely on Israeli public radio and television, and cannot imagine my mornings without Reshet Bet.

We were not brought up to be leaders. My father, Jakob Witzthum, an individualist, preferred to observe life and not to take an active part, and my diligent and shy mother worked mainly behind the scenes. My brother and I learnt from both of them: we grew up knowing who we were but, in contrast to Dale Carnegie, we never tried to  influence people.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/who-needs-the-israel-broadcasting-authority/

It's Time To Listen: Women Wage Peace

Yesterday on  9th of Av, in the tent of Women Wage Peace, there were more fasting women than usual, as women fasted to commemorate ancient and recent national tragedies.

Some calamities are inevitable, when we lost the brakes in our car on the highway in Italy, we knew that we were going to hit the car in front of us.

But the last war, known by the euphemistic name Operation Protective Edge, was not one of those tragedies.

Few days after the beginning of the war in July 2014, in the Israeli Arab town of Tira, more than thousand people gathered at the center of town taking part in the demonstration: “Jews and Arabs refuse to be enemies.” They were speeches pleading that it was still not too late to stop the war, many people carried  signs in Hebrew and in Arabic. One woman stood next to  the stage throughout the event, holding a  big sign in Hebrew “Jewish and Arab women refuse to be enemies.”

The women of Women Wage Peace want to make sure that this time, someone will  actually see the signs, listen to reason and take actions.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/its-time-to-listen-women-wage-peace/

The Comfort of Denial

A powerful cartoon on PBS,  by Jack Ohman, with the perfect title: “In my dad’s final weeks, I was still in Denial, “  reminded me, this morning, of the time of my husband's illness. I too, till the last moment, was in complete denial.

This is an essay in which I argue that denial could be helpful when dealing with tragedy.

Sometimes I hear people remark “she is in complete denial,” several years ago that's probably how they described me. They could not have known, but at that time I chose denial as a way of life and as the best course of action. After my husband was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer, and heard from the Oncologist about his prognosis, I decided to put that knowledge aside.

Please keep reading in the Times Of Israel

http://blogs.timesofisrael.com/the-comfort-of-denial/

Jack Ohman's cartoon

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/everything-went-wrong-dads-health/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=pbsofficial&utm_campaign=newshour